Can’t do it alone… 

When I’m feeling so lost and I don’t want to be found.When I’m looking and listening for that peace in my heart.

But I know I’ll never hear that sound.

Where do I go?

Where do I go when I’m trying to laugh but all I can do Is cry?

I’m trying to keep on living because I’m not ready to die.

Where do I go because the sun never seems to shine?

How do I keep going, how do I fight this fight?

I’m tired of feeling beat down, but I’m trying with all my might!

Where do I go when my head hangs so low?

Please give me an answer because I just don’t know!

Where do I go?

Does it take very long?

For me to find that peace and a place where I belong.

I need you to help me, help me to take a stand.

I’m scared to do it by myself, will you please take my hand?

Everyday I’ve been doing the best that I can. 

What else can I do? Is there purpose for me? 

I bow my head low and fall to my knees… 


Narcissistic times with you…

I miss the times when you were heretelling me to have no fear

To hold my head up high and strong

add happy notes to my sad song
I miss the way you look at me

As if I were too blind to see

The path I’m on might hurt and scathe

But all goes well if you just have faith
I miss the sound of your sweet voice

Through bitter times a saving noise

That told me what was right and wrong

But rang in my ears for far too long
A caring person, you were such

That helped and hurt me, oh so much

You’d guide and mislead me through the day

You left me lonely when I’d rather you stay
Over things like that you had no control

A rock set in motion will continue to roll

No matter how hard you tug and heave

You were always pushed and forced to leave
Then one day you never returned

My tears so hot they almost burned

Aware now about what I lack

But crying and mourning wont bring you back
For me to let out what I need to say

I can’t do much more than pray

No longer am I weak, my hearts quite strong

From adding a happy chorus to a sad, sad song.  


She never knew it would be like this… the reaction of her fate, yet she remains ever so confidant that things will soon change. She came to talk to me for a while to give me a brief break down of what she was going through and all the while she was talking, I thought to myself, ” I can relate to you”. Moments of terror from day to day…. not knowing what mood their in, hiding her face and body from the bruises that came from him.

Verbally, physically, emotionally it hurt and also her mentality and spiritual worth disbursed. I cried while she began to explain how bad she felt to stay… I let her know that her feelings were just that and it may never go away.

Abuse comes in many forms and some we just dont know…. but HERstory is to be shared to help other women grow.

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You just never know by looking at someone what they’re going through… so be careful how you speak and react because it could some day be you. What would you do if the tables turned, who would you talk to? You feel in heart that trust is gone and you cant trust anyone…..

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I will say this….. Dont look down on others because you dont know where they’ve been…. we all have a story of testimonies and we all have sinned, just take the time to know someone and use better judgement so you can have a positive and healthy life. When people tell you things, its not for you to gossip and spread things you are unsure of…. you are told because you are meant to change something or learn from it.

Herstory could be your story….


Soy mas que una hija, una hermana, una madre, una abuela, y una esposa; primero soy un hijo de Dios. I dont claim to be Holy or Religious but I do know right from wrong and I do believe in a higher power. I believe in the Trinity; The Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

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Are problems should be temporary, not permanent…. Why do we have to have hatred, anger, molestation, abductions, abuse, greed, poverty, pride, sorrow and more that cover our minds and hearts?

When are we…. when will we come together to become a great and better nation? Can it happen? Will it happen? How hopeful are we at this point? I judge no one because I have no heaven or hell to put anyone in, I dont judge because my hands are not clean and my thoughts are not always pure, but I refuse to never speak up for what is right.

Again, I dont claim any religion but I know right from wrong and if WE dont start to RISE as a NATION and make things better I feel that we will lose a lot in this world. We should not be of the world but in the world, for we will not stay in this world when we die. We should live our lives in Love, Peace and Harmony.

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Our children deserve to be safe from harm and suffering. They need to be shown a better world. It saddens me to the pit of my heart that there are people that can hurt others and turn around and smile in someones face, go to work all day, acting like nothing has happened or no one is affected.

Being an advocate for Domestic Violence, Eating Disorders, Suicidal Ideation and Crimes against children I thought I would be making a change by speaking out but there is so much more work to be done and I need to keep educating myself so that I can keep educating others. I will continue to fight for those with out a voice and I will do my part no matter how small it may seem.

Image result for pictures of the crown of gloryThere is enough room for us all here in this world to make a change. To stand up for what is right. I am more than I ever knew I would become… I fought hard to be stronger, wiser, and with more faith in my heart, I speak life over death daily.


From Grief to Joy

There is no pain that Jesus can heal… but let’s just start from the human part of us to where we finally realize that the battle is not ours… it’s the Lords.

Being human, we go through so many trials and traumatic experiences that it sidetracks us from doing and becoming who we need to be and should be. It keeps us from holding our head up high. We have days when we would rather stay in bed with the curtains drawn closed and not answering the phone.

Then out of the blue we get strength… we get courage… we feel like there is hope, we feel like we can try just one more day, just one more time before we fall back down. In that moment we dont know that we are in the comfort of the Lords arms, but we just get up and fight depression, we fight anxiety, we fight the negative mind-set of others and walk in a new light.

From our grief to joy, we are here. From grief to joy, we are healed.

From our grief we have learned that what hasnt killed us has made us stronger because we have defeated the last giants. And from the joy we have felt , we know that we can and have been happy and we can be happy again.

We can make it through…. we have made it through. No matter what the world has placed on our shoulders it is up to us to share love, comfort, and compassion so that the hearts of others will change. Whatever grief or hatred they have been exposed to or taught, I feel it can change; we need change.

Let’s be the change we seek… From grief to joy.

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Lesson Learned

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I am so grateful for my accountability partners, my strong spiritual circle and for my Family…. I have been surrounded by so much love and also have grown from counsel and advice.

Thankful doesn’t begin to speak what my heart is pouring out.

I have learned to surround myself with like-minded people as well as those that can lift my spirits and allow me to be their accountability partner and lift them. They have become my family; not because of what they have given me, but for the unconditional love.